The Spoiler Puzzle
I absolutely can't stand it when I want to see a movie, and somebody comes around and
spoils the ending for me. My friend Andy
doesn't mind "spoilers" as much as other people do. In fact, he's generated a
list of 60 spoilers to ruin your day. He wants to know how many movies you can recognize
from the spoiler. They can be theatrical films, made-for-TV movies, or straight-to-video
releases.
- He's not really still alive; the laughter is coming a gag joke box.
- The remains of the Statue Liberty prove that he was on Earth the whole time.
- She awakens to find it was all a dream, and her friends (and enemies) were characters in
it.
- To the surprise of his family, she revealed she actually loved his brother.
- If the guy hadn't been so prompt about returning the key, no one would ever have solved
the crime.
- The chick was really a guy.
- His memory was wrong; it was a completely different guy that released the virus.
- James Bond and the girl have sex.
- The man she thought she loved never loved her; the man she really loved doesn't love her
anymore; the North have burned down her home and have won the war; nonetheless, hope
springs eternal.
- The son actually believed he was his own dead mother.
- The mother actually believed she was her own dead son.
- He was named heir because he refused to give the secret of the Everlasting Gobstopper to
the competitor.
- Despite their success in destroying the DeathStar, Darth Vader manages to escape
unscathed.
- The pregnant police chief captures the psycho single-handedly.
- The ex-pilot and stewardess rekindle their love, and even the autopilot gets a piece of
the action.
- Some may say that crime doesn't pay, but it paid a little.
- The servants kill their corrupt master and return to their home planet.
- Judas's angel ponders on the odd choice of Israel in 4 B.C.
- Despite the warning of his father, he turns back time to save her.
- The feather wasn't magic after all; it was just a placebo.
- He winds up being the father of his best friend and mentor.
- Despite a plethora of opportunities, he never quite gets the chance to score with
Christie Brinkley.
- A cavity search is the closest he EVER comes to scoring with ANYBODY.
- He undergoes a tranformation that sends him to the next level, similar to the process
that caused apes to become human.
- His death by crucifixion doesn't have to happen, but he resists the temptation to step
down.
- His death by crucifixion is inevitable, but he spends his last moments looking on the
bright side of life.
- The surgery was a success; nothing grosses him out anymore.
- The change of identities results in the wrong man getting sent to, and killed in,
Vietnam.
- Once upon a time he was a bully; now, he's an effeminate car-washer.
- Aided by dishonest nuns, they make it to Switzerland, (even though Salzburg isn't
anywhere near the Swiss border--Ed.)
- The reconstruction of the delegates results in a jumbling of personalities, but--who
knows--it may aid world peace after all.
- He supports himself on his injured leg to deliver the final kick that wins him the
tournament, the girl, and the respect of the bully community.
- They are offered the coveted rich-and-famous contract.
- He finally realizes on both the conscious and subconscious level that the "real
world" is simply an illusion; as a result, he can't be harmed by anything in it.
- The operation was only temporary; he's retarded again.
- The plant's tough, but electricity is tougher.
- A cowboy marries a farm girl; maybe they can be be friends after all.
- The first officer repairs the warp drive with his bare hands, killing himself but saving
the ship.
- Thanks to basketball advice from the Professor, the team of robots is soundly defeated.
- Is he a Replicant or isn't he? We're never too sure.
- He may really be a man, but the wedding's still on; hey, nobody's perfect.
- Juror #3 finally realizes he's angry with his own son, not with the defendant, and votes
to acquit.
- OK, so maybe the world IS better off with him than without him, but the crook is still
never brought to justice.
- The only way he can return to his own time is to alter history in some positive way.
- He keeps his word and sets the genie free.
- He chose wisely and both he and his father survive. Fortunately, the girl they both
slept with is a criminal and thus isn't forced to choose between them.
- The police arrive and insist the camera be turned off.
- He's the son of a sea-cook and not really related to his family after all!
- The grandfather will read the book again tomorrow if his grandson so wishes.
- The final battle occurs outside the very theater where the movie is being shown!
- The President himself pilots a plane to defeat the aliens.
- He wasn't visited by aliens after all; it was just a tumor.
- The good guys go to heaven, the bad guys go to hell, and Whoopi Goldberg has a part in
the oddest menage a trois in the history of movies.
- The mime is the chattiest character in the whole movie!
- The Workers below and the Thinkers above decide to iron out their differences and not
send sexy robots to do their dirty work anymore.
- The Rev. Jones dies, but his monument make a mountain from a hill.
- Not even being on a chain gang will deter him from preaching the Holy Word.
- He skis the K12 and survives!
- They ALL pass the AP Calculus test!
- He can spell "fussbudget," but he can't spell "beagle."
Copyright 1999 by Andrew A. Poe, all rights reserved.
Email your questions, comments, or requests
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Doug
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