Oh!  Why does no one
understand my outer pain!
Don't they know I give it
freely, without gain.

Like a bouquet of condoms
delivered by a gorrilla.
I touch their Tokyo
with my psychic Godzilla.

Oh!  My outer pain.
People try to impress my with
what they got.  But they assume that
I care, so they've already lost.

They try to interest me with
their blather.  It's like listening
to the news delivered by a
retarded Dan Rather.

My outer pain is ready
to be used.  Why don't people
enjoy my abuse?

I give my outer pain
for my advantage.
Because people around here
have mental damage.

Don't they see
when they insult me,
I don't give a shit?

I'm too busy translating
Jerry Lewis into Sanskrit.
(more funny, yet simple)

My outer pain --- why, why,why?
Is it because I'm a white
guy, guy, guy?

They try to get me to join PETA.
Get away from me!  I'm
doing my meat eating.

They try to insult me because
I'm happy.
But why?  Go on home to
your mammy and pappy.

A poem with 10,000
adjectives to describe licorice?
When my head just pounds ---
pounds from all that gibberish.

Oh!  My outer pain!
I don't want to go on a
big rant... Oh!  Yes I do

.

My outer pain is creeping
out of my innards.
Kind of like that guy who always
requests Lynard Skynard.  (Freebird)

I think that's all the
outer pain you can handle.
My combat boots might
crush your sandals.

 

Everything I say is true.
Everything I tell you, go out
and do.

Don't teach, learn, or act
like anyone else.
Act foolish and childish, your
true inner self.

Don't sleep on beds of
silk and satin ---
Don't teach your parrot English...
teach it Latin.

Don't think you have
the gift of gab, you'll
look like a hooker with a
bad case of crabs.

All this outer pain I
have to give will save your life.
Don't try to solve conflicts
create more strife.

Don't try to tell me about stuff.
Because I'm the only one legally
authorized to read poetry
"inside" the Laughing Cup.